Full of Matrix

            I always thought that dreams were just illusions and never really meant anything other than just a weird trip that we experienced in our brain. I never realized that instances of déjà-vu and feeling as if you had already done something before came from dreams. I tend to day dream a lot, I’m always constantly thinking in my head and rarely pay attention. I know that even though we don’t remember having a dream we actually do dream at every night. Our brains keep constantly working even while we are still asleep. Just because you can’t recall a dream doesn’t mean that you didn’t have one.

            Which is why I was talking about having déjà-vu, I tend to get déjà-vu a lot and hate it because I know I’ve been in a certain situation before and I try to defuse it by doing something different. I remember one dream in particular, I was going through a maze and was trying to find my way out, its actually funny because I fell asleep watching Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. In the movie the main characters also have to go through a maze to get to the goblet of fire and are being attacked by the maze itself. In my dream I made it out to the end of the maze and got out, but I was greeted by huge stone face. He started telling me that I had to solve this impossible puzzle box and that the last person who tried it died before he could finish it because there are 100 different puzzles in the box, and it gets harder and harder the further you get to number 100.

            I remember only a couple of levels as I kept trying to solve all the 100 puzzles, it was getting to the point where math was involved. There were instances where I couldn’t concentrate and I began to sit try to figure it out. I thought I was never going to solve this gigantic puzzle, until a note came out of the sky. It told me all the answers and let me pass easily. The only puzzle it didn’t have for some reason was number 86 which had to deal with me talking to someone on the other side of the puzzle. At first I thought that all I had to do was just talk to the old man and he would eventually get tired of me chatting it up with him. After some time had passed by, I noticed that he wasn’t going to give up the final puzzle.

            I then figured out that he wasn’t there to give me the answer, but that he was the answer to the puzzle. I grabbed the old man and pulled him outside of the puzzle, he was frail and old and looked as if he had been there forever. When I dragged him out of the puzzle he just disintegrated in my hand. I was at a loss for words and so from his ashes another note that said I was free to leave. I began walking but then I had woken up and didn’t see what was going on afterwards. Two days later I was with my girlfriend and we were sitting down watching television when she told me she had a surprise for me. I waited to see what the surprise was and she pulled this rubix cube. I saw a connection to it but didn’t know where I had seen the object before.

            While I was holding and lookin at it I remembered that this was one of the puzzle’s in my dream, instead of colors though the cube had numbers to it. The next thing I noticed was her sweater, for some reason it had the number 86 on it, it was her track sweater. To this day I still don’t understand what it all meant but I’m still at a loss for words by the whole situation. I told my girlfriend about it and she just laughed at me. I still haven’t found a note or some ashes so I’m just assuming its coincidence. But I believe that dreams usually tell us something, that they can tell us if something is wrong or if something is going to happen in the future. We can’t ever be sure what dreams mean, but after that weird dream. I feel like I’m in the movie The Matrix, as if my body is asleep somewhere and you don’t know if you are still asleep or awake. We live in dreams and so we are weak to its beautiful persuasion and mystery. 

"I have had dreams and I have had nightmares, but I have conquered my nightmares because of my dreams." - Jonas Salk

Its All In Your Head

One of the most objective times I have ever endured with another person was when I helped this random person on my way home from BART. I was walking and a blind stranger was trying to find his way to a certain bus stop and was a ways away from the BART station. I was on my way home, and was almost about to reach my house in about 5-6 minutes. While I was crossing the street I noticed a blind man crossing the same street and asked if he needed some help. I was well aware that I was almost home and was already dragging my feet as I was nearing my destination.

But something had compelled me to help this poor man who had probably been lost for awhile as he was trying to desperately find the BART station. I felt so bad that I actually walked along side him guiding him by voice all the way back to BART. It took me 25-30 minutes to get back there. By now means was I complaining as I was actually having a very thoughtful and funny conversation with the blind man. But I just couldn’t help but feel my spirits lifted as I kept talking to the blind man. The day had dragged on for me as I went from BART to SF State and then back to Hayward.

I understood that I was being selfish and thoughtful towards this man who didn’t have any clue where he was. Looking back at this experience I realize that it actually wasn’t him who was blinded but it was actually I who was blinded by all the beauty surrounding me. I mean, there is this blind man who doesn’t even know which way is north or south and he was joking with me and telling me stories of who he was and what he use to do. He was a real old timer, he knew what he wanted out of life, and there I was, youthful as could be but I didn’t know which direction my life was going.

I still don’t know what direction my life is heading towards, I have a million different ideas in my head and I want to do so much but I know there isn’t enough time to do everything. I wouldn’t mind relaxing either, this blind man made me realize that we never stop to look at the sights and the sounds of the world. All we do is just pass by and never look around to enjoy every little moment that life has to offer us. I was very humbled to be in his presence, because I never met a person who had almost everything taken away from them and still be able to enjoy his life and make every second count. I mean he was telling me about when radios were the big thing back in his time and how it was the greatest invention.

Now our life is more Television and Internet, we don’t interact much with real people anymore. It’s a digital age; we are getting lazier and more advanced as the years go by. We have gotten so far away from human contact that we don’t go visit our grandmas or family members we just either Facebook them or text them. If they don’t have either, then we just don’t bother contacting them because driving to them or even speaking on the phone feels like a savage act. We need to appreciate and practice being humble towards one another, recognize that we advancing but never forgetting to stop and look around. Because you never know what might be the last thing you ever see with your own eyes.